Blew up another planet and exterminated another entire species last week!
I’m a Superstar Intergalactic Agent. One of the best! A planet destroying award winner with an outstanding record of destroying lifeforms!
But things weren’t always so great for me…I’m ashamed to admit…that once days were dark for me…You see I used to be addicted to Hapkomah Dice.
Everyday I used to play the dice. I don’t know what it was, I didn’t always win. Actually I lost a lot – but the risk, the risk was a rush. There’s nothing like those dice in your hands, right before you role WOW…I miss it.
I used to dream about the dice…every morning…every night…for breakfast…for lunch…for dinner.
GIVE ME THE HAPKOMAH DICE
Um…I guess I developed kinda a problem
I guess you can say I was an addict.
And then…ROCK BOTTOM. I was strung out. I forgot to launch and missed a deadline to destroy an entire galaxy we were planning to eliminate for a millennium.
Well no big deal…we blew up that galaxy a year later and I gave up the dice.
Sort of reminds me of Ohio State…no Eastern Kentucky pass rusher Noah Spence
If you don’t know by now Noah Spence is one of many pass rushers available in the 2016 NFL draft. And he was kicked out of Ohio State for positive drug tests.
Before he was kicked out of Ohio State, Spence was a starter for the Buckeyes in his very first year, not easy to do on that talented team. In 2013 Noah Spence compiled 52 tackles, and 8 sacks in 12 starts.
But 2014 was not so smooth for Spence. He was suspended for his bowl game and the first two games on 2014. Then he tested positive again a second time in 2014.
Spence’s problem was with ecstasy. He openly admitted he had a problem and went into a drug treatment program. Spence had to watch the Buckeyes make history and win the 2015 College Championship on TV like the rest of us.
He didn’t come out in the 2015 draft through. Spence transferred to little ole’ Eastern Kentucky. What can I tell you about Eastern Kentucky? Well I think its on the Eastern side of Kentucky and Noah Spence played there for a year.
And did he ever play.
In 2015 Noah Spence had 11.5 sacks and was a force on the field.
He bounced back! Just like me!
So why should an NFL team take a chance Spence?
Well if 6-3, 252 pounds with speed doesn’t excite you…then you should find your way to the next planet I destroy…because you are not alive.
But do you want to spend a high pick on a guy with that checkered history. Spence is expected to go in the first two rounds of the NFL draft.
So he is quite a risk.
Which also reminds me of dice…
If Noah Spence was a Alien Weapon of Destruction, he would be the deadly
I hate you Hapkomah Dice…But I love you too.
Check Out his highlights here.