Sodomized at the Draft with Colonpokey: The Ireland Years


Until last year, there was no greater lightning rod for Dolfan debate than whether Jeff Ireland deserved his job or not.  Want to relive the case for firing Ireland?  I assure you it will make your butt hurt.


We start in 2008 when the Ireland/Parcells duo selected Jake Long with the first overall pick.  Jake Long was one of the best Left Tackles in the game for some time.  But should the Dolphins have taken Matt Ryan?  Long is basically out of the NFL now and Ryan is going strong, albeit the Falcons aren’t winning like they were early in his career.

But its not the selection of Long that should have Dolfans scratching their heads.  Its the 2nd round selections of Philip Merling and Chad Henne.  Now your butt hurts doesn’t it.

This is the Ireland curse.  The curse of the 2nd round.  Its probably worth while to include the 3rd round in the Ireland curse as well.  During the Ireland era, we rarely brought in good football players in the 2nd and 3rd rounds.  And he had a lot of them to play with.  Take 2009 as an example.

NFL: Preseason-Miami Dolphins at Tampa Bay Buccaneers

After the Dolphins parted ways with Brian Hartline this year, there are no more players from the 2009 draft on the roster.  Our first pick that year, Vontae Davis was shipped to Indianapolis to find his way around the urinals there.  Davis has excelled with the Colts.  We took a 2nd cornerback in that draft named Sean Smith.  While Sean Smith was a whipping boy for Dolfans during his time in Miami, he hasn’t been half bad in Kansas City.  There is a possibility that Sean Smith is Ireland’s best 2nd round pick.  While you are finishing puking in your mouth, remember the real failure of the 2009 draft.  The two Pats!  YUK!!!!


2010 brought a few Dolphins who have been productive for the Dolphins.  The Dolphins traded back in 2010 to take Jared Odrick who also left this offseason.  In the 2nd round the Dolphins took Koa Misi, who started at MLB in 2014.  The Dolphins actually selected 4 linebackers in that draft to help Mike Nolan run his defense.  The biggest bust of the 2010 draft was probably John Jerry who may have eaten his way out of Miami.

So Ireland is back on track right?  2011 should be great right?  No Dolfans, No!  Butt hurt is a mysterious thing.  In 2011 the Dolphins traded up from the 3rd round into the 2nd round for Daniel Thomas.

2011 Draft

Thomas had some moments as a Dolphin.  He blocked well and scored a few TDs.  He also blew out Darell Revis’ knee on a little cut which earns him a place in my little hamster heart.  But the trade up and the fact that DeMarco Murray was available in the 3rd round gets him on this list.  I bet you are accusing of me of hindsight right now.  You are right!  I am looking at your ass!  But you should be aware that most experts had Murray rated higher than Thomas in 2011…except Ireland.

Oh Yeah, the Dolphins selected Clyde Gates in 2011 in the 4th round.  And a lot of us celebrated the Glide pick in the 4th round…oops.


In 2012 the Dolphins selected Ryan Tannehill with their first round pick, a selection I greeted with cheers and shots.  In the next round the Dolphins would get a steal.  An anchor to protect Ryan Tannehill and his name was Jonathan Martin.  The Great Martin would become known to Dolfans for his toughness.  Not a bad 2nd round pick right?


In the next round Ireland would continue to help Tannehill by bringing in a reliable weapon, tight end, Michael Egnew.  What a pair of great picks by Ireland right?  Does your butt hurt?  I bet it does.  Well, here is the good news, while Martin and Egnew aren’t very good football players, they make one hell of a dessert.

Those 2012 players quick exits are easy to evaluate as busts, but players like Dion Jordan and Jamar Taylor are still a mystery.  So I will keep my hamster trap shut about those guys.  After the 2013 season, Jeff Ireland was fired to the delight of many Dolfans.  The evidence above points to the obvious fact that Dawn Aponte got a quality GM fired based on a play for power and the dysfunction in the Dolphins’ front office…right?   Right?  RIGHT?


I hope I made it difficult to sit for the rest of your day.  Next week, we take a look at the Shula years.  Even icons have bad moments.

This post is Pokey endorsed.  Don’t ever accept a Pokey Post without the seal of Pokey!


The Mock Poll Draft Goes On!!!


Even though the Dolphins have picked.  I am still nevous.  Who will fall?  Who will go early?

The Eagles are on the clock

What will Chip Kelley do?


Don’t know what other team’s needs are?  Here is some mocks by the experts at to give you an idea

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357 Responses to Sodomized at the Draft with Colonpokey: The Ireland Years

  1. Mike E. says:


    Just read it on my phone. Very nice story. I must be getting old, I totally forgot he was on the Yankees. Now I remember the whole deal when he was traded to the Marlins.

  2. Mike E. says:

    Yeah, sure Tim . . . . . . lol

  3. D says:

    The Flying Pig says:
    April 7, 2015 at 1:30 pm
    Peters was my second choice

    You figure Chip Kelley knows his old division rivals too

    The Eagles and the Ravens need help int he secondary badly

    CBS has Collins at the 72nd best prospect!
    9th best CB
    I don’t know why they don;t like him
    most people have him top 5
    Jalen Collins is my favorite CB of the draft. He’s a great combination of a lot of good attributes, size with speed for press, closing speed for zone, and spped and the refined technique to stay in a receivers back pocket for man

  4. D says:

    Your Picks:
    Round 1 Pick 14: DeVante Parker, WR, Louisville (A+)
    Round 2 Pick 20 (PHI): Benardrick McKinney, ILB, Mississippi State (A)
    Round 3 Pick 20 (PHI): Jaquiski Tartt, SS/FS, Samford (A)
    Round 4 Pick 15: Senquez Golson, CB, Ole Miss (B+)
    Round 5 Pick 13: Jake Ryan, OLB/ILB, Michigan (B-)
    Round 5 Pick 14: Cameron Artis-Payne, RB, Auburn (A+)
    Round 6 Pick 15: Wes Saxton, TE, South Alabama (B)

  5. wyoming85 says:

    Dbolt48 retweeted

    Doug Moore ‏@DMM0822 · 1h1 hour ago
    Source: #Dolphins & WR Greg Jennings have agreed to a deal. #NFL #NFLFreeAgency

  6. Mike E. says:

    SWEET! Welcome to Miami Mr. Jennings!

  7. Mike E. says:

    Where has D-Bolt been? Any of you see him on lately?

  8. Mike E. says:


    I know he’s on twitter, I meant on the blog silly!

  9. Mike E. says:

    So, we have Stills, Landry, Jennings and Matthews. Either Parker, White, Perriman, or even Dorsett or Coates would really round out the receiving corps nicely.

  10. D says:

    Kinda funny how things ended up. When we took Wallace we passed on Jennings (who was my favorite for us to sign) Vikings missed out on Wallace, settled on Jennings. This offseason we come full circle, and now they have Wallace and we have Jennings. To me, it almost feels like a cosmic righting of a wrong lol. Maybe its a good sign of good things ahead.

    • jahndoh says:

      Jennings was my preference too. Like Tim, I just fell in line when it became apparent we were going to land Wallace…but I will say it now. Unlike Brandon Marshall, there was NEVER a time when I found myself liking Wallace. There was at least a period of time with Marshall where I convinced myself to like him, but it’s like there was never so much as a honeymoon with Wallace.

      That said, I don’t think Jennings is any sort of long term building block for this team, but he’s a damn fine stop gap if we just need a guy to start next year for whatever reason. We draft one of the young studs in this draft and we’re much improved at WR from when we ended last season. As it stands I think it’s arguable whether we’ve improved, regressed or stayed the same. I’d probably opt for the latter.

  11. Brian in NY says:

    LMFAO @Tim!

  12. Tim Knight says:

    A bullet that reached its destiny years later
    Henry Ziegland thought he had dodged fate. In 1883, he broke off a relationship with his girlfriend who, out of distress, committed suicide. The girl’s brother was so enraged that he hunted down Ziegland and shot him. The brother, believing he had killed Ziegland, then turned his gun on himself and took his own life. But Ziegland had not been killed. The bullet, in fact, had only grazed his face and then lodged in a tree. Ziegland surely thought himself a lucky man. Some years later, however, Ziegland decided to cut down the large tree, which still had the bullet in it. The task seemed so formidable that he decided to blow it up with a few sticks of dynamite. The explosion propelled the bullet into Ziegland’s head, killing him.

  13. jahndoh says:

    Just because a dog has jock itch doesn’t mean it’s horny. You guys are so immature! 😛

  14. Mike E. says:

    I was really excited when we signed Wallace, but my preference was Jennings.

  15. Tim Knight says:

    I have not seen any other reports that we signed Greg Jennings.

  16. herdfan says:

    It’s national beer day! 🍻

  17. Al in MIA says:

    Jennings took a stroll this morning before deciding on signing that contract…

  18. Al in MIA says:

    Omar Kelly ‏@OmarKelly 40m40 minutes ago

    Nothing on Greg Jennings and the Dolphins YET. Stay tuned. Remember he needed to pass a physical.

  19. Al in MIA says:

    LeGarrette Blount suspended one game by NFL for his marijuana stint with Le’Veon Bell. I’m pretty sure Goodell first checked the internal NFL docs to see if the Dolphins were scheduled to play NE in Week 1 :/. Pretty much guarantees NO lol.

  20. stangerx says:

    The Hernandez case is in the hands of the jury now. During closing arguments the defense lawyer admitted for the first time that Aaron was present at the murder, but had no clue it was going to go down. He’s essentially saying he is guilty of being part of the cover-up, but that ain’t murder either.

  21. The Flying Pig says:

    The eagles select Arik Armstead
    the Bungles are on the clock

  22. Al in MIA says:

    WPLG Local 10 News ‏@WPLGLocal10 52m52 minutes ago

    Wow!!! Local 10 viewer sends in amazing pic of bobcat catching shark on a Florida beach!

  23. stangerx says:

    And Will Allen always seemed like one of the good guys.
    “Former Miami Dolphins, New York Giants and New England Patriots cornerback Will Allen, along with a Florida woman, was charged by the Securities and Exchange Commission for running an approximate $31 million ponzi scheme from 2012 until February of 2015.”

    According to the complaint “Allen along with his business partner, 54-year-old Susan Daub, managed multiple companies they founded under the umbrella of “Capital Financial.” The pair gave questionable loans to athletes after raising money from investors, telling them they could receive up to 18 percent interest in returns. Then, Allen and Daub used money for personal expenses that included night clubs and pawn shops. Allen and Daub reportedly ripped off over 40 investors for approximately $31 million.”

  24. Al in MIA says:

    Can’t see how the Eagles would pull the trigger on a trade with Cleveland unless they can be guaranteed Mariotta (and that can’t happen unless Cleveland is on the clock without Mariotta having been selected to that point). The other possibility is that the Eagles are targeting another player or value 2-3 of them very high who they expect to be available (perhaps a CB that they think Miami will select?). Perhaps if Gregory were to slip to 13, they would take him.

  25. The Flying Pig says:

    The Bengals Poll is up

  26. Al in MIA says:

    Omar Kelly ‏@OmarKelly 2h2 hours ago

    Seriously, who still goes to message boards in today’s social media era? Your grandpa?

  27. The Flying Pig says:

    The obligatory Bud Dupree vote is in
    Guy gets one vote every poll…

    • Al in MIA says:

      He’s a good candidate for the Texans as Tim pointed out before but for our mock draft…Might as well call his name lol now again.

  28. The Flying Pig says:

    There is no searching for hamsters
    When the hanster is ready – it finds you!

    (A shreiking sound is heard in the background)

  29. The Flying Pig says:

    I’m crossfit bound
    be back later
    I want at least 10 votes!!!


  30. Mike E. says:

    So WTF – Did we sign Jennings or not?

  31. Mike E. says:

    Apparently, tiger erections are blocked at work as well, not that that’s a bad thing. lol

  32. Mike E. says:

    If you just add WR at the end of that sentence, it works.

  33. Mike E. says:

    Speaking of tiger erections, former Miami Dolphins QB Dick Wood passed away today. RIP Dick

  34. Mike E. says:

    Jets signed LB Erin Henderson. Somewhere, GDP sheds a tear . . .

  35. Tim Knight says:

    It doesn’t sound like Jennings signed. We probably didn’t offer enough. We’re probably in the market for a vet WR on a one year deal and these guys are hoping for more.

    • Brian in NY says:

      He may just be mulling it over, or we may not have offered him a deal yet either.

      • Tim Knight says:

        True, but Crabtree left the same way.

        That said it may be their only opportunity and at some point they might have to accept.

  36. BoulderPhinfan says:

    funny stuff piggy.

  37. BoulderPhinfan says:

    I think the phins want to see if we somehow parker falls to us before spending money on a veteran WR like jennings or crabtree.

    • jahndoh says:

      I don’t think the fins are going to spend much money on either of those guys. How long will they be unemployed before they have to sign a deal? They going to wait until the WR rich draft gives all their suitors young, cheap talent?

      The jig is up for those guys. They won’t be getting anywhere close to the money they had hoped they would get.

  38. Brian in NY says:

    I can’t wait much longer for the draft. The anticipation is killing me!

  39. The Flying Pig says:

    Don’t forget to vote

    We only have 6 votes so far


  40. Brian in NY says:

    14: R1P14
    47: R2P15
    114: R4P15
    149: R5P13
    150: R5P14
    191: R6P15

  41. son of a son of a shula says:

    Oh yeah Cincy only needs a pass rusher so leave a top 10-15 prospect on the board and reach for a lineman.
    O-line crazy blog

  42. Try Pod says:

    RIP “Sheriff Roscoe P. Coltraine”
    James Best
    You’ll get those Duke Boys eventually

    • son of a son of a shula says:

      He used to show up on the Andy Griffith show from time to time.
      RIP James Best
      git git git

  43. Tim Knight says:

    The Bengals are looking for pass rushers and defense overall so I picked Dupree for them, good value. Not sure what is driving some of these picks. Not trying to criticize but some of these picks after the top 10 didn’t make much sense. I really hope CB is not where we’re going. Waynes is a good prospect but I don’t want to think some of the young corners we have are already afterthoughts and I don’t think they are. I think Taylor will be penciled in opposite Grimes to start things off and we’ll go from there.

    • son of a son of a shula says:

      I agree totally

    • jahndoh says:

      I gave a pretty good rationale of my pick for Cinci, Tim, no offense intended (at all!) but it seems like you think you know other teams’ needs better than the rest of us. Maybe you do tbh. But for Cinci 3 of the 4 mocks picked OL. They DID just pay Dalton a ton of money. It’s a typical model to protect your investment in that situation. They also have more draft picks besides the first round to address their needs.

      I’m sure it could go either way there, but it’s not like one option is totally off the wall while the other makes perfect sense or something…

      • Tim Knight says:

        Okay but if you’re looking for a pass rusher and he’s there and then take an OL it’s weird to me. Look at their offense and defense stats and tell me where they’re looking. It’s pretty obvious.

  44. The Flying Pig says:

    I’m pretty sure peat and Dupree are the next 2 picks

    It makes sense
    Both team are looking for pass rushers and OL

    If Dupree went to Cinci
    I would just pick Peat to Pitt

    So the fact that it’s Peat to Cinci and Dupree to Pitt is pretty irrelevant

  45. The Flying Pig says:

    New Browns helmet

  46. Tim Knight says:

    I have to throw this out there. There are a couple of our young playera that get criticism for playing time performance and even the coaches get blamed for it. I just want to point some stuff out.

    1. Dion Jordan – was drafted coming off of a shoulder injury that required surgery. He was not 100% too make a big rookie impact but he played STs and got 12-15 defensive reps per game. The coaches got blamed for not knowing how to use him. That’s comical.

    2. Jamar Taylor – had a sports hernia injury he had to have surgery for and then got messed up because of a narcotic he was taking for an illness that messed up his body and could have killed him if not corrected. He did play in 9 games.

    3. Dallas Thomas – also was coming off of a shoulder injury and really didn’t play at all as a rookie.

    1. Dion Jordan – put on weight and muscle in the offseason and got suspended for 4 games for PEDs. Then failed again for a more recreational drug, got 2 more games and entered a rehab facility before the season ever started. The coaches got blamed for not knowing how to use him. That’s comical.

    2. Jamar Taylor – played in 12 games before separating his shoulder and got shut down at the end of the season. Showed some promise too.

    3. Dallas Thomas – played guard and tackle and showed potential and got his lunch handed to him as well.

    There is more to it with these guys than just flippant statements that coaches don’t know how to use them, they’re not durable or just simply suck.


    • son of a son of a shula says:

      Hopefully they all live up to their draft status at some point we have to go forward rather than just keep replacing the same positions over and over again.

    • jahndoh says:

      I didn’t know that about Jamar Taylor. What was the deal with the narcotics? Addiction? A bad reaction with another medication?

      • Tim Knight says:

        Something he took for an an illness he was dealing with almost shut down his organs. He got it corrected and then got back on the field. Not into looking it up but I read it for sure.

  47. The Flying Pig says:

    The Steelers are on the clock

    Is it Bud Dupree’s time
    My Oink senses say yes…

  48. jahndoh says:

    Peats overall ranking on CBS was 19 and he went 21st. I don’t see how that’s a reach? Meh..doesn’t matter I guess. It’s not like we were going to nail the draft with our democratic mock anyway. LOL…

  49. The Flying Pig says:

    Did you guys know that 3 of the 4 mocks on had the bengals going OL
    Peat in 2 of them
    the 3rd was Flowers

  50. jahndoh says:

    BTW Tim, I’m with ya on hoping CB is not what we do in the real draft. I just don’t see that as a pressing need for us, and I don’t see Waynes as one of those players you just can’t pass up either.

    Don’t know what we would do if all of the top 3 WRs are off the board, but you know one player I wouldn’t complain about us picking. 🙂

  51. The Flying Pig says:

    The one real problem I have wit our mock draft so far is Kendricks at 15

  52. The Flying Pig says:

    I think we should bring in a young CB
    The one thing I don;t like about Waynes at 14 is that I think we can get a good CB to play in our system later in the draft

    but Waynes was the BPA when we picked
    and he has potential to be special IMO

    If he is a lockdown corner
    and we have an awesome pass rush with Suh and Wake leading the way – its going to be great for our D

  53. The Flying Pig says:

    Come on Humans
    Only 2 votes so far

    This one is obvious to me

  54. The Flying Pig says:

    Meat, beer and Tequila

  55. son of a son of a shula says:

    jahndoh says:
    April 7, 2015 at 10:07 pm (Edit)
    No way, meat and beer. What else is there?
    Man business, what does a pig know anyway?

  56. jahndoh says:

    “Okay but if you’re looking for a pass rusher and he’s there and then take an OL it’s weird to me. Look at their offense and defense stats and tell me where they’re looking. It’s pretty obvious.”

    Do the same for us and then explain why the whole world has us going WR in the draft. We’ve already discussed that I think you overweight pass rush. I think it’s important, but you already told us you take pass rush over WR everytime, so maybe you’re bias is driving your choice?

    Just sayin’ be open minded. Maybe what you see isn’t all there is too it. That’s the point of doing it this way, you get to see others’ rationale.

    BTW, you’ve yet to address that 3 of the 4 NFL experts had them going OL (2 of them taking Peat no less) at that spot. So maybe it’s not all that obvious afterall.

    I mean this totally constructively too. Not trying to instigate. I’ll take a break and go eat dinner and read your response when I get back. It’s all good. Respect and cheers!

    • jahndoh says:

      I hope it’s not coming off like I’m picking on ya Tim. Sorry if so. I really don’t intend it that way.

  57. Tim Knight says:

    Jahn, I don’t get offended by draft pick differences. LOL

    Peat is not a reach here, I just don’t think that’s where CIN will go. The Bengals only allowed 23 sacks last year and only had 20 on defense. Marvin Lewis is a defensive coach. Ding!

  58. son of a son of a shula says:

    It turns out that James Best has ties to my little city, apparently he used to live here and the Townhouse restaurant has a painting of a rooster hanging inside that he painted, Oviedo is known for the free running chickens that run around downtown and believe it or not hang out mostly at the Popeyes.

  59. son of a son of a shula says:

    Tomorrow is Wednesday so you know what that means – Another edition of Absolute Perfection and another Dolphin win. OD will put you on the 50 yard line as the “no names” cream Broadway Joe and the gang green.

  60. Tim Knight says:

    Jahn, trade down into the 20s, get a 2nd and 4th, take LB Kendricks 1st, 2nd OT D.J. Humphries at 47, and WR Dorsett in the late 50s.

  61. BoulderPhinfan says:

    I saw that the phins are bringing in wes welker for a visit. I think this is purley for his locker room presence. I’m not sure how much welker can contribute on the field.

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