During the summer, when we wait for the football season to begin and swim in the ocean
We fear what might be beneath the surface of the ocean…
Sharks scare all of us.
And there is no shark more fearsome than:
THE GREAT WHITE SHARK
But not all sharks are so great.
There is at least one who is
well…kind of mediocre…
Meet The Mediocre White
slightly less accomplished than some of the other white sharks
and like you…a fan of the Miami Dolphins
On an August afternoon the Mediocre White was hunting seals with a two of his shark buddies
They found the perfect spot and were ready to feast.
The first Great White turned to the other Great White barely noticing the Mediocre White lagging behind both of them.
“What’s your plan?”
The Second Great White responded “I’m gonna go deep, get a big push and leap out of the water with the biggest seal in my jaws”
“Nice!”, the first Great White responded
“You’ll get in National Geographic…I plan something a little more dubious…I’m gonna bite a baby by the back of its’ tail, drag it a little father out to the ocean, wait for its’ mother to swim out to the baby, then eat her. Then I’ll eat the baby for dessert”
Impressed, the Second Great White turned to the Mediocre White “How about you?”
“Oh me?” The Mediocre Shark was barely paying attention
“Um…you know dude…I’m gonna like, put my fin above the water and like circle the seals and then eat one”
“lame” interrupted the First Great White
“What happened to you man? ” The Second Great White disappointedly said, “You used to be great. Now you are so…Mediocre…”
The two Great Whites swan away leaving The Mediocre White.
That day The Mediocre White didn’t eat any seals. Instead he thought to himself
WHAT HAPPENED…
In the 70’s he was Great.
One year, in 1972, he was perfect, never missing a seal or a human he hunted.
Those were the days, The Mediocre White was the envy of all the other sharks. He ate whatever he liked, he spawned with whatever shark he liked, he even roomed with Steven Spielberg in college. Some say he was the inspiration for Jaws.
Though he never achieved perfection again. He had some great moments after the 70’s.
In the early 80’s The Mediocre White continued to be a fearsome hunter in the ocean. At the same time he enjoyed watching the Dolphins make Super Bowl runs.
Despite a chum strike in ’82, he finished second among all sharks in surfer limbs eaten. Only a shark named Riggins ate more arms that year.
In ’83, he grew his greatest rookie tooth. By the tooth’s second year he was setting records for flesh eaten.
The Mediocre White almost enjoyed the new tooth as much as he enjoyed watching Dan Marino throw the ball.
By 1985 The Mediocre Shark was making great memories by eating Bears on prime time.
But as great as the tooth was, the Mediocre White failed to surround his tooth with quality other teeth.
Defensively, everything got through his mouth, and he found himself forced to digest entire scuba divers, tanks and all.
Unbelievably, during the tooth’s entire career, the shark failed to hunt down a 1000 yard swimmer.
Eventually when that special tooth fell out, the Mediocre Shark wondered if he was ever achieve what he did in the 70’s again.
Meanwhile the Dolphins moved from Don Shula to Jimmy Johnson to Dave Wannstedt
The Dolphins had a few great players in that time: Jason Taylor, Zach Thomas…Ricky Williams lead the league in rushing one year. And like the Dolphins the Mediocre White enjoyed eating an occasional swimmer.
But it was not what it used to be. He wasn’t really Great anymore…
Now it seemed these up and coming New England Sharks were eaten all the best humans
By the end of Wannstedts tenure it became obvious…he was just mediocre now…
So he left hunting and went in a different direction.
The Mediocre Shark took up engineering.
He wanted to build something. Just like he believed Nick Saban wanted to build something with the Dolphins.
In his first building project he built the Daunte Culpepper Bridge:
Saban would not accept failure and either would Mediocre White.
He really insisted on Building something!
Like Saban, his next building project made people cry.
So Saban would leave the Dolphins and The Mediocre White would leave engineering.
Now he was ready for a new direction.
The Dolphins hired Cam Cameron and The Mediocre White took up work as a Park Ranger.
At a county meeting he attend determine to make a difference
“Broh’s” he pleaded to the County Council,
“We need to stop the deer deaths on the highway”
The Mediocre White raised his fin, “I propose we move the deer crossing signs away from the highway to a place less dangerous for the deer to cross, we should move the signs to the middle of the forrest”.
That year deer deaths on the highway increased by 800%
As the Dolphins moved on from Cam Cameron The Mediocre White also moved on from being a Park Ranger.
The Big Tuna was ready to turn things around for the Dolphins and the Mediocre White was ready to turn things around for himself as well. He took a job with the City.
Everyone assumed given his prior history of greatness, like the Tuna, he would excel.
They gave him a simple task. The streets need to be painted to make them safer.
Any shark can do that right?
Well…maybe not this shark…
He failed at first
and failed again.
eventually…the Dolphins found themselves in the Ireland era
And the Mediocre White found himself operating a draw bridge
He was a colossal fuck up…like Jeff Ireland
So the Dolphins found themselves in the Philbin era
and The Mediocre Shark found himself bouncing around from odd job to odd job
he tried parking cars as a valet
That didn’t last long
So he got a job as a custodian
but he often found himself late at performing his duties…
He really wasn’t very good at anything anymore…
But we all know what he is:
He is a hunter!
The 2016 football season has not started yet…
The Mediocre White wants to be Great again
Is this the year?
Finsmob Unleashed 
Doooooo doooo doooo
Good ole Bobby McCain
Great pick
Carroooooooooooooooooo
(Blowing in a conch)
Good ol’ Bobby McCain
https://twitter.com/theflyingpig44/status/764265958101946368
Beef?
Better be
Oh Pasysinger that should have been a TD
Nice strip Aikens
I feel like I saw it coming For about 3 minute
Has Damien been working out this summer he seems solid.
Our own GOT character Ulrich John sealed off the edge nicely on that TD run
The Flying Pig says:
August 12, 2016 at 8:48 pm (Edit)
Why did Williams take Lamar millers number
**************
Maybe he thought he’d be faster
Didn’t the reverse happen last yr in preseason. Our starting O and D dominated, then our lack of depth took over.
Wtf
That was the worst return since John Travolta
Williams always looks better running after a catch
He is like a poor mans terry Kirby
Carrooooooooooooooooooooo
That was ridiculous
Wow, you play like shit for a qtr and a half, then take a 7 pt lead just like that.
Hey Paul Perkins
Al liked him
I thought that was Brandon Marshall with that TD catch. Sometimes it’s better to be lucky than good
Pead- his pants
I told you guys, Pead.
So Tunsil hasn’t earned a starting job?
By default I think he has.
He’s looked good tonight
Doughty!!!
Good throw to little Grant
We would have killed lazors for that 3rd down play BTW
Grant show
Jakeem the Dream
Grant should at least make the practice squad.
GrAnt man
Grant!!!!!
Wooohooooo
I went to Lincoln High School
Shocked they didn’t mention me . . .
These commentators are on autopilot sometimes and have no idea what they say a lot of the time. Matt Darr punts 35 yards end over end…. WTF, how does a punt go end over end? End over end is a filler phrase these guys use, when they don’t have anything to say. Tannehill back to pass, looking for Parker deep, the pass end over end…
A Duarte sighting
Duarte!!! Yeah baby!
Doughty
Grant
Duarte
Caroo
All showing up
Tunsil had a good game too
Farty for Duarte!!!
Hull’s been all over the field.
The D has given up nothing for quite a while. Still no depth Omar?
Grant hurt his ribs
From laughing at how slow everyone around his is
I’m not going to get too crazy about this game. Slow start, a bit sloppy, depth played better as the game went on. Here’s what I took from the game.
1. We do attack on defense and play man.
2. Love the balance of under center and shotgun.
3. Gase understands the value of running the football even if only 2-3 yards a pop. Al gets this. 🙂
4. Grant will make the team, wait until the speed of the game slows down in his head and his legs take over. He showed a lot of versatility tonight and didn’t look overwhelmed.
5. I saw quite a few young players flash and no serious injuries. 🙂
LOL at #4, did you read my comment above?
Sorry, missed it.
Steve
You said he’ll at least make the PS. I think Grant is too electric to be on the PS, he’s a good returner, and although Landry wants to keep doing it, they still need another guy, and Grant will be it. Also, get this kid the ball in space and give him a crease, and he’s going to make things happen.
I think he may be the starting return man in thee seaso opener
Why not?
All of our young guys looked pretty good
Tunsil, Huarte, carroo, doughty and Grant
I didn’t see drake or maxwell
Would be. Ice to get a look at them too
Too early to just give Grant the job, but if he continues to do as well as he did last night, I think you’re right, he will be the return man.
Miiiiiiike, the dude was balling last night the comment was sarcastic. When he’s the only punt returner up until the time he got hurt, and he’s performing well, it means it’s his job to lose. There would be a war in Miami, if Grant doesn’t make the 53.
Not going to get too crazy about the first team not playing well on offense. If it’s like that in preseason game 3, then we may have an issue. Foster, Parker and Landry barely played, and Dallas Thomas was still starting at G.
When Parker doesn’t play the first team O struggles, but I think it has more to do with Dallas T. I hope that fraud is off the first team, and put Bushrod on the other side.
Tannehill didn’t play like a man with no more excuses this year.
It’s only the first game of preseason. Players have different reasons for motivation, OV obvious, rookies of course want to play well, and guys in a position battle (Dallas that means you). Vets on the other hand just go through the motions, Alberts. With that said RT had no time to throw, and I’m not sure how much they really wanted him to get involved last night, being the first game.
You can’t take anything away from this game. 1st pre season game means nothing.
The score means nothing, but plenty can be taken from it, for instance Duarte isn’t Egnew.
Good example
And agreed
We aren’t waiting the entire year to see duarte
He is already being used
Let’s see how far up the depth chart he can get
Rookies played well, Doughty I think kept himself off of the practice squad by moving the ball (not sarcastic), but man we’ve got a lot of work to do before the season starts. I think our 2015 UDFA LBs played pretty well too, and my reason of why an LB was taken after the 3rd round in the draft. Gotta get Tunsil in the starting lineup, NOW.
The starting LBs did not play well
Kiko Alonso completely whiffed on a tackle that could have saved a td
You just said preseason is for young players, but guys that didn’t perform well last year and new players like Kiko should also have been motivated to put out a good first impression.
The preseason is for young players
Yeah the win
The score
The stats
They don’t matter
But seeing good young players perform – THAT MATTERS
That practically the purpose if the preseason
So It was nice to see our rooks respond well
They can build on that over the next couple of games
And then take it into September
And hopefully help us win
Grant got a lot of chances to return yesterday and I tend to think we can expect that trend to continue
The trend will continue with Grant’s returns, up until they have him locked in as the punt returner to start the season, then I think they won’t risk injury in game 4.
Could you imagine Grant on the practice squad and NE getting their hands on him?
NO DOLPHIN GAME HIGHLIGHTS seen here on Tampa Bay channels. Locals still celebrating the fact that the Bucs only lost by 8 (?) points to Philly in preseason game. Tampa’s second round draft pick, place kicker Aguayo out of Florida State, MISSED his first PAT!!! –Well, the goal posts in the NFL ARE NARROWER than they are in college, right?
———-
Already sounds like this team is ahead of where Philbin’s team was exactly a year ago. Sure hope that’s a sign of better things to come. —OUT to mow lawn before it hits 90 degrees.
My point on the game doesn’t mean anything is directed toward the first team. There is no game plan and there is no film study so impossible to really take any thing away from their performance
Watching this game again. I really want them to start figuring out the oline sooner rather than later and let them gel a bit. If tunsil is gonna start LG then he needs to practice there with the first team the rest of preseason.
I wasn’t impressed with alonzo at mlb.
Me either to be honest. I think he had good position most of the time. Flowed to well. Looked fast. Didn’t finish well
Omar Kelly @OmarKelly 1h1 hour ago Manhattan, NY
I’m sooooo sick of the Dolphins offensive line being an excuse for a bad offense. FIX IT! 4 first rounders. 3 Pro Bowl talents. FIX IT JESUS
We looked sloppy overall with the first team o and d. Phillips was really disruptive at DT though. Fede looked decent. Bobby McCain was off and on OK. Lippett was decent. Jenkins looked OK. All the safeties looked kinda bad. Thomas didn’t look great in the slot. Dallas Thomas got blown the fuck up on one play other looked decent. James got blown up on a couple. Albert too. Isa looked really bad actually both in run and pass pro
Gotta give O props for this one:
Omar Kelly @OmarKelly 2h
2 hours ago
Manhattan, NY
Watching Hard Knocks for the first time. I love Jeff Fisher’s line, “that’s 7-9 bullsh!t!” Hasn’t Fisher been 7-9 his whole career?
Horrible read by Matt Moore on that pick
That’s what he’s done his entire career. He’ll make some plays, but then do some boneheaded things, like taking a hold the ball too long sack to push the ball out of FG range. I still can’t get over the sack he took against Dallas that year he started for us, might’ve been on Thanksgiving, it was right before the half.
Omar Kelly @OmarKelly 13h
13 hours ago
East Rutherford, NJ
The Dolphins need to ditch this bigger is better at CB approach and try Bobby McCain as the starting boundary guy opposite Byron Maxwell.
———————————
I agree, but VJ has already said he’s playing the 2 best on the boundaries, so if it’s McCain that’s the 2nd best he’ll be starting outside.
Turner looking bad at RT, Tunsil good so far at LG
Chris McCain got a lot of props for practice performance but he isn’t looking good in this game so far
Omar Kelly @OmarKelly 13h
13 hours ago
The Dolphins must be auditioning Matt Moore for a trade or something. Why is he still playing?
———————————————
I’m ok with that, but they aren’t going to get anything more than a 6th or 7th rounder for him, and he’s fairly cheap this yr. With that said, if RT gets hurt we most likely aren’t going to the playoffs anyways, so Doughty up to #2 is ok with me.
Bobby McCain didn’t look good I’m sorry Omar way off on this
He said Chris McCain also looked good, you don’t seem to agree with that either.
He didn’t look good
Grant looked pretty good to me on returns. He is going to get loose a few times this year I can feel it
Don’t know how much good advertising Matt Moore got out there. He is looking awful so far
Why are you commenting on plays while the game is on replay when it’s over? You sound foolish.
Because I’m watching it for first time right now. I’ll take foolish it’s better than other comments I have had made towards me
I get that you’re watching it for the first time, but when you say this about Moore’s first couple of series, when he played very well overall, you sound like a scratch of a record player needle.
I thought Harris looked better than McCain at boundary. Lippett didn’t look bad imo, though he didn’t have much thrown his way, which says something imo
MIght be only cause of upside potential, but seems Lippett has the best chance to be a legit #2 CB.
Bobby had a nice play on that int. Still doesn’t offset being burned on others lol. Omar just takes highlights and use them to base his opinion instead of basing it on overall play
Steve I get that but overall play can’t be ignored. So if we see bad play from first 4 series it can’t be overridden by a couple good ones when the 3rd stringers were in on defense
I’ll come back with a full game eval, but right now I’m prefacing my statements by say at least so far
If Steen keeps playing the way he did yesterday he’ll solidify his spot as the backup C. Douglas had two bad snaps in his first series as C.
Thomas is a major liability and will continue to be so until we send him to San Diego with his brother Jimmy
Julius Warmsley was a pleasant surprise last night but we all know how stacked the d-line is. However, if he continues to play well he’s hard to ignore.
Young, Urbik and John would need a miracle to make the roster.
I think we should generally be pleased with the play of the backup qb’s last night. yeah, they played vs 2’s and 3’s but so does every other team’s backups during preseason.
That pick was a first stringer like pick. Position was great a starting NFL QB would have tried that through and it likely still gets picked( though I do think they would have thrown it higher) but there were a couple coverage miscues that would have been TD if Eli was in there. So we get a pick but he potentially cost us 14 points… You tell me, is that successful or failure?
Lou I didn’t see consistent lay from Moore yet. Still waiting to see doughty. I get what your saying but I don’t see what ya want in a backup from Moore and that’s consistent play, someone who won’t lose you games if they come in in a pinch.
For the first game I think they did pretty well. Would like to see them improve on what they did this game in remainder of preseason but, overall, they played well.
Pitts looked as good on that pick as McCain.
Interesting comment from Tanny about getting smacked by Olivier Vernon: “He hit me pretty hard. Didn’t give me a warning.”
Is that like he had no warning on the field, or is that either when it is preseason or with ex-teammates the hitter is supposed to say a little before — “coming to talk about how Lauren’s doing”?
That TD by Moore was pure accident. Threw into triple coverage but was so off on the throw a different receiver caught it. Hazel had a step on the coverage he should have been the target anyway
Think we have learned over the years is that Moore looks like a much bigger fish when swimming with smaller fish…..not as good when the sharks are there. Not sure if it his lack of arm strength or just that teams no who to game plan against his limitations.
Again overall I know it’s first preseason game, I’m not down on our guys but I’m calling failures out and successes as I see them. I get y’all’s points but I just am going play by play. I can just go watch the game if irritating you guys
Aww come on D….not like you haven’t been to this board before. 🙂
And I at least didn’t see anything but the 4th Q…..so do appreciate.
It was a 1st PS game and at the end of the day once the season starts nobody talks about any PS games. It’s practice.
WOW, do we still have a lot of work to do…said 31 other NFL head coaches
Doughty looking solid so far
Stanger I’m not taking my ball and going home I just didn’t want to put fourth the effort if it wasnt something others didn’t want to read. Was offended by comments
Wasn’t
So far Grant has been the standout for us to me.
Ulrick John is poop btw
By far out worst olineman
He’s the white Dallas Thomas….lol
Grant has looked good in punt and kickoff return and pretty good as a receiver. I’d like to see some of him out of the HB position
John did seal off the edge on the Damien Williams TD, and he has a great GOT name.
That was a sweet heads up play by both players…..looked great on the highlight reel.
Will say there wasn’t as much dropoff with the subs as there was last year. I’m glad our depth looks a little better
The depth got to show us what this new base defense and offense will look more like…..can’t wait till the ‘ones’ get it down….patience friends, patience!
I really think the NFL would be better off if there’s was a minor league system
Who you can tell that if they just had a few years to settle into a system and actually develop might actually turn out to be good players but the cut from there 53 and only able to keep 10 for PS means most at going to bounce around and eventually just fade out.
It would also bring the NFL closer to more markets and build fandom I think
A few …not who
Billy Turner and Dallas Thomas looked bad last night as well too
What did it say…it’s already been removed
Hull dust look too bad this game. Not special but solid. Same for Gray
Didn’t man this phone sucks for posting
D
They could expand each teams PS, and the PS teams could play other PS teams in weekly scrimmages.
Same kinda idea I think. Just they could make more revenue if they ha minor league stadiums that people who dont live close to a major league team could attend
I see what you’re saying. Not sure if there’s any demand for that though. Good college programs would probably be better.
Piggy, Turner and Thomas did not look good, but I think turner bothered me more. He was getting assistance from center on most plays where as Thomas wasnt. Thomas had one play where he looked like he was on wheels he got driven back so fast but on other plays looked decent. Turner looked all kinda out of place at RT.
I’m glad though that Tunsil looked solid.
Grant will no doubt be a playmaker.
Yeah
I feel good about 4 of 5 spots on the OL with Albert, Pouncey, Tunsil and James
But I’m still worried about that other OG spot
D
I remember the play where #63 (Thomas) looked like a light blocking sled. lol
That happens way too often to him.
I agree
The depth got to show us what this new base defense and offense will look more like…..can’t wait till the ‘ones’ get it down….patience friends, patience!
That’s the point total we need, getting turnovers makes scoring a lot easier. It’s the perfect formula for winning just keep building on it.
http://www.miamidolphins.com/multimedia/videos/Preseason-Week-1-Dolphins-vs-Giants-Highlights/15afaa45-b567-4c6c-bffc-986572f6387a
Good 3 min recap on video!
More NY style cheesecake.
McAdoo is a Pennsy boy
He’s going for the Tuna look. LOL
Bruised Apple
Tim
He needs to gain about 100 lbs, and gain another 2 tons of ego weight if he wants to be Parcells. lol
LOL, but he’s trying. It looks like he’s wearing a flotation jacket.
How about all that man coverage and no playing far off man? 🙂
The defense is definitely an attack defense that mans up every down.
https://twitter.com/holdmybeergif/status/764537006479253504
I saw an interview after the game with Jakeem Grant and he didn’t seem like his ribs injury was anything serious. If they were fractured he would have been in pain and not talking to reporters.
But they said the same thing about Ajayi, after a preseason game last yr, then he sat out about 6 weeks, so…
Nobody said anything, I watched him talk and if it was serious you’d know it. if he had fractured ribs I don’t think he’d even be there for reporters.
http://www.miamidolphins.com/multimedia/videos/Grant-I-Just-Wanted-To-Make-A-Play/917f9d41-ce31-4e22-b48a-fca0fc9d3e69
Caught the last 2/3 of the game yesterday. We have some exciting young players to watch and develop. Not much to really say about preseason game 1, but it’s always nicer to have the win. Now we finally get to learn about this year’s team firsthand over the next couple of weeks.
Woohoo! Football’s back!